Hello Old Friend

I can say old because I have had this beast, I mean delicate flower, for nearly two years. That is precisely one year and six months longer than restoration was supposed to take. The good news is that it should be done by the time my kids grow up, go to college, and buy a home so I can park it in the front, Cousin Eddie style.  I digress.  Finally made it out to work on the trailer today which is no small feat.  I haven’t been logging any work hours on her the last few months since I went back to school full time.  Psssttt, I’ll let you in on a little secret. . . taking full time college classes does not get easier with age.  Turns out I really have to study, like a lot.  So, Molly has to take a backseat.  Today though, the sun was shining, homework was done and the kids were at school! Perfect. I remembered where I was in projects, I demoed some shit (always feels good) and then I used a super grinder sander thing and made some progress on a totally not related to anything necessary right now project.  It was a win .  It felt good to be back at it. Now all I need to do is replace two corners of frame, rewire for electrical and propane and I can put the siding back on!

Glamorous LIfe of an Amateur Restorationist

One Perfect Thing


I’ll keep it short today because when you have a piece of perfection it doesn’t really need words.  In case you forgot what the oven and stove top began as here is a reminder:


In all of it’s deuce colored glory

This is what love looks like.


No matter the hole in the floor or the side panel yet to be put on, I have this now. Possibly the most glorious thing in existence.

Lemon Squeezy

I meant to work on the floor today, I REALLY want a floor.  This is a project that requires my FAVORITE brother’s supervision, and he was laying concrete.  Lest I be recruited to do that (it was raining and looked like torture) I thought I should find another project I could handle on my own.  I decided I had stared at that gigantic useless water tank long enough.


It was time to go.  Beat it asshole, you’re out of there.  Like a boss I pulled out the bench supports, twisted off the outside spout and then called my Mom because god damn it I could not for the life of me undo the thingy (that’s actually the technical term, look it up) underneath the trailer.  My Mom is a rock star and twisted it off like it was nothing.  I started to try to yank the stupid thing out of there but no dice.  What in the heckfest? Ahhhhh that’s right, there’s that underneath thingy!!!! So I sawzalled that B off, and the tank popped right out.  One more project crossed off.  Of course if you’re keeping score I did add an additional two holes to the trailer taking out the tank. I guess it’s still a win, right?  I actually don’t know.


Time to Rally

Winter hiatus is over. Super over. The dark and depressing malaise of the last few months has finally lifted and out of the gloom I’ve rediscovered my grit. I needed to start out with a win and I needed a for sure win. I was not interested in my normal “win” that turns into a fucking avalanche of disaster but a real tangible win. So obviously I shopped out a little work.  I sent my hideous (although functional) stove top and oven door to the Powder Coat guy and although I have not seen them yet, they could hardly get any worse.  “Deuce Brown” has it’s place and I’m sure, at one point, it was a lovely color choice but instead I opted for teal with a fresh coat of “whatever the eff powder coat is” on the hardware and vent.  It takes every bit of my grown-up reserves to not call every day to see if it’s done yet just so I can have something done and accomplished. To be fair to my awesome Powder Coat guy I did tell him my time line which may or may not have included a finish date of 2025. So he can pretty much take his time.  I just really need to have this one pretty thing.

THE BEFORE (also just pretend none of the red exists, just like, none of it),


Something I’ve learned over the winter, my Fireball is actually 16′ long, not 14′, I should probably know stuff like that.  The Fireball FB group, who are such an amazing resource, had some cool original Fireball Catalogues, it was looking at those that I discovered my new piece of comical idiocy. Comical idiocy is probably the best way to describe the way I feel and operate while muddling through Molly, everyday.  Anyway,  I’m also not changing the name on the blog, what would I even call it?  “16′ of sass?” dumb, or maybe “16′ of sexy” ewww or how about “16′ of sparkles”? Actually I like that. So maybe that or I’ll keep it  14′ of Fury, who can know these things? I may just go back to calling her Ass Face and call it a day.

The Amazing Fuck-Ups of a Restoration Amateur

I dont know about you but I’ve really enoyed watching this blog turn from “Molly McFixit to Molly McFuckit.” To honor this new phase of vintage trailer ownership I thought it would be fun to share some of the more idiotic things I’ve done while working on Molly.  I do a lot of really stupid shit on any given day but here are some of the extra special gems. You’re welcome.

We bought the trailer on May 11th.  I bought the adorable black and white check flooring in the evening, of May 11th. Seriously. The same day.  Guess when I’ll get to put it in? What you don’t know? Oh probably not,  since I DON’T KNOW! Genius.  At least I bought enough right? Nope. I thought to myself “The trailer is super small, one box is probably enough. I don’t need to measure. Measuring is stupid.” Yeah, I had to order two more boxes.

I used this ladder one time to get on the roof because I was too lazy to move the big ladder (I mean it is REALLY heavy). It is some kind of miracle I didn’t fall to my death on that thing.  The only reason it’s there is that it helps hold down the tarp on top of the Dream Machine. That’s right, every single rung has been cut so that you can’t actually use it for a ladder. Unless you have a death wish. Awesome.


My most favorite though is when I went out and looked at fabric for the cushions. HAHAHAHA. Because that’s totally happening this year. “Oooh I don’t know babe what do you think? Kitch or modern, turquoise or orange?” FUUUUCCCKKKK. I am surprised no one tried to strangle me with my stupid fabric swatches.

Which one?
Which one?

Or when I thought,  oh you know what would be fun, ripping out veneer without trying to save the pieces for a pattern.  Or that time I inhaled asbestos just so I could rip up some stupid tiles or when I sanded the exterior without a mask (those tissues were so GROSS). You can pretty much (100%)  count on this being a recurring post.  I could fill a post of stupid shit I do at the trailer daily.  Again, you’re welcome.

Tearing It Up

I decided to just get as much shit, I mean pieces of beautiful history, out of the trailer as I could.  I wanted to see exactly what we were dealing with and prioritize projects.  I pulled up the carpet, took down all the blinds, the mural wall paper (look at that!  I did manage to let you go) the backsplash (installed just well enough to be a pain in the ass to remove but not well enough to look good), all the terrible stickers and the bathroom floor.  This is where it gets fun. So the downside is there is still a leak, but the awesome part is this means we have to make the exterior a priority and THAT means PAINTING! I’m  not actually remotely close to painting but I’m a year closer than I thought I would be so hells yes to water damage!

20150516_155512 20150516_155515 20150516_155520 20150516_155522

I guess this is progress? All I know is I look sexy as hell.

Glamour Shot
Glamour shot. You’re welcome.


It’s like me and the Fireball are dating and this is our getting to know you phase.  All of those “quirks” are just SO adorable right now.  I actually told Phil today that I found some water damage, but it’s cool because it’s the “fun kind of water damage.”  Someone is going to have to break it to poor Molly though, this is going to be one of those really unhealthy relationships where I tell her I love her and then get to work changing EVERYTHING about her.  Don’t feel to bad for Molly though, she’s got all kinds of fun bombs to drop on me.

How will I ever say goodbye to you weird mural?
How will I ever say goodbye to you weird mural?
That's right, there's TWO
That’s right, there’s TWO
Where to start…..
Seriously, why would anyone do this to anything?
Seriously, why would anyone do this to anything?